Forgiving After Loss (Montana Wallace)

Have you ever had to work on forgiving someone who is no longer here? It’s a strange concept. Knowing they won’t be able to hear what you have to say or have a conversation to help you understand things. I was a big daddy’s girl growing up. My whole life my daddy struggled with addiction. I didn't know much about it until I was around 10 years old. The last 8 years he was alive were less than great. When he passed in 2016, 9 months before I got married, I had every emotion you could think of. For months I was the angriest I’d ever been. Mostly at him, a little at God. See, at that time all I could see was my daddy chose drugs over me and my sister. He loved that more than us. It took months to work through those emotions with God. Lots of conversations about how my daddy’s story ended. But I ended up learning that my daddy was sick. He had an addiction, and honestly, he didn’t have the resources to help him overcome it. I so badly wish I could’ve been that for him, but I was a child. I also learned that my daddy’s story isn’t over just because he isn’t here. My oldest son reminds me so much of my daddy. His love for fast cars and football. The way he likes to make people laugh and gives the best hugs. 

Ephesians 4:32 says,

“And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ.”

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So I’m here to say, I see you. I know the journey is hard, and I’m sorry if you’ve had to walk through any part of your life with a loved one who had an addiction. But what I can say is, be the light. Show them Jesus the best you can. Grief comes and goes like waves, but it doesn’t have to consume us and swallow us up. I pray that you overcome it with God right beside you.